Tuesday, January 27, 2009
Friday, January 23, 2009
VINDICATION?
My Best Friend and me went shopping yesterday for food and I got the result I was
looking for. After itemizing the receipt for her food, my food, and
shared food; the balance was that I was responsible for 47% of the bill
and she, 53%. Very close to the 50/50 that I had been advocating since
the start. It may have been a coincidence or maybe this is the way it's
always been (don't feel like going through months of receipts to prove
it). Either way, I win :-) -- we're 50/50 again on the receipts. Math
comes through for me again! :-D
Thursday, January 22, 2009
Tuesday, January 20, 2009
STUPID LIBRA III
My Best Friend and I actually made it a whole week without fighting with each other over anything. And it wasn't even because we didn't see each other. It's like we found a detente of sorts.
For the food receipts issue, I've just decided that I'm still gonna buy stuff anyway. I may as well take advantage of the fact that I work in a supermarket. However, I will run all receipts by my Best Friend now so she can decide what she will chip in for and what she will buy outright. I didn't want it to be that way. My Best Friend and me aren't just roommates who got together through an ad in a newspaper. We've been friends for a hell of long time. We're family and like family, I wanted to just share the expenses so that we wouldn't have to become petty and/or territorial with our food. Also, I figured if we were splitting the food bill half and half regardless of who eats what, that when we have guests over, we wouldn't have to be bad hosts by refusing to let someone eat my food or her food. I guess it won't be that way and I'll just have to accept that. *Sigh* I don't look forward to the territorial disputes that are likely to erupt at some point.
My Best Friend did the dishes a couple of times this week as well which was nice. There may be hope for us after all :-p
(originally posted to That Other Journal on January 20, 2009)
For the food receipts issue, I've just decided that I'm still gonna buy stuff anyway. I may as well take advantage of the fact that I work in a supermarket. However, I will run all receipts by my Best Friend now so she can decide what she will chip in for and what she will buy outright. I didn't want it to be that way. My Best Friend and me aren't just roommates who got together through an ad in a newspaper. We've been friends for a hell of long time. We're family and like family, I wanted to just share the expenses so that we wouldn't have to become petty and/or territorial with our food. Also, I figured if we were splitting the food bill half and half regardless of who eats what, that when we have guests over, we wouldn't have to be bad hosts by refusing to let someone eat my food or her food. I guess it won't be that way and I'll just have to accept that. *Sigh* I don't look forward to the territorial disputes that are likely to erupt at some point.
My Best Friend did the dishes a couple of times this week as well which was nice. There may be hope for us after all :-p
(originally posted to That Other Journal on January 20, 2009)
Friday, January 16, 2009
MY NEW CELEBRITY CRUSH?
"Why Do You Let Me Stay Here?" by She and Him
I've been hearing this song at work and I really like it: it puts me in a
good mood. The video's entertaining to watch too. Who knew Zooey
Deschanel was so cute? (or is it just in this video?)
:-)
:-)
(originally posted to That Other Journal on January 16, 2009)
Wednesday, January 14, 2009
PERIOD
I decided to yield to temptation a few minutes ago.
This girl I've been crushing on since July 2007 and haven't spoken to (or seen as she works the morning shift now) since she finally deleted me from MySpace (October 2008) was on AIM.
I sent her a sheepish, "Am I even allowed to talk to you?" with an embarrassed-looking emoticon and the response I got was, "Who is this?"
Ouch. :-/ A fitting punctuation?
And for those of you who know me, I actually tried with her. I got her phone number, we chatted a few times. We IM'd a few times. I asked her out. She said yes. And when the day came, she stood me up. Being the desperate forgiving douchebag that I am, I asked her out again about two months later. Again, she agreed and again, she stood me up.
I hate being smitten.
ADDENDUM:
A few weeks back, Digby actually spoke to me for the first time in like nine months. Granted we only see each other rarely these days; but still, it came to me as a surprise...even more so because I had just finished pointing out to my coworkers how, even though I know it's a coincidence, I swear Digby seems to avoid me when we do cross paths -- clocking out early, finding something to do down a random aisle, going on a break at exactly that moment, etc. When she spoke to me, I have to admit it half-annoyed me because I was starting to find her apparent avoidance of me funny. It was like a game that I was starting to look forward to. =] I apologized for being a douchebag to her online (without referencing the origin of this behavior...namely, her standing me up) and she waved it off like it was nothing/alright. I really have to wonder if she even knew what I was talking about at this point as I highly doubt I was worth remembering to her. We even chit-chatted the following week when I told her that I was moving and she related a similar story to me. It felt like old times when I still yet had no clue just how disinterested in me she actually was. Anyways, MySpace keeps suggesting her as a friend. I thought I'd attempt to refriend her with a lighthearted "I promise I'll be good this time" message to accompanying. However, I found out yesterday that she had blocked me on MySpace (Facebook too? I haven't checked. Her birthday is soon...I'll likely message her a birthday greeting that day so I'll find out then)...ouch, and in the context of this entry...double ouch! I have to admit though, the main thing I'm interested in at this point on her MySpace page is if she systematically deleted all my photo and profile comments after deleting me. Maybe I'll find out, maybe I won't. I can't hold my breath though. She's very beautiful to me and always will be no matter what; but, fool me once...shame on you: fool me twice...shame on me: fool me thrice...you pathetic fool, am I right? I must actually take comfort in the sin of pride...who knew I actually had some? (May 26, 2009)
(originally posted to That Other Journal on January 14, 2009)
This girl I've been crushing on since July 2007 and haven't spoken to (or seen as she works the morning shift now) since she finally deleted me from MySpace (October 2008) was on AIM.
I sent her a sheepish, "Am I even allowed to talk to you?" with an embarrassed-looking emoticon and the response I got was, "Who is this?"
Ouch. :-/ A fitting punctuation?
And for those of you who know me, I actually tried with her. I got her phone number, we chatted a few times. We IM'd a few times. I asked her out. She said yes. And when the day came, she stood me up. Being the desperate forgiving douchebag that I am, I asked her out again about two months later. Again, she agreed and again, she stood me up.
I hate being smitten.
A few weeks back, Digby actually spoke to me for the first time in like nine months. Granted we only see each other rarely these days; but still, it came to me as a surprise...even more so because I had just finished pointing out to my coworkers how, even though I know it's a coincidence, I swear Digby seems to avoid me when we do cross paths -- clocking out early, finding something to do down a random aisle, going on a break at exactly that moment, etc. When she spoke to me, I have to admit it half-annoyed me because I was starting to find her apparent avoidance of me funny. It was like a game that I was starting to look forward to. =] I apologized for being a douchebag to her online (without referencing the origin of this behavior...namely, her standing me up) and she waved it off like it was nothing/alright. I really have to wonder if she even knew what I was talking about at this point as I highly doubt I was worth remembering to her. We even chit-chatted the following week when I told her that I was moving and she related a similar story to me. It felt like old times when I still yet had no clue just how disinterested in me she actually was. Anyways, MySpace keeps suggesting her as a friend. I thought I'd attempt to refriend her with a lighthearted "I promise I'll be good this time" message to accompanying. However, I found out yesterday that she had blocked me on MySpace (Facebook too? I haven't checked. Her birthday is soon...I'll likely message her a birthday greeting that day so I'll find out then)...ouch, and in the context of this entry...double ouch! I have to admit though, the main thing I'm interested in at this point on her MySpace page is if she systematically deleted all my photo and profile comments after deleting me. Maybe I'll find out, maybe I won't. I can't hold my breath though. She's very beautiful to me and always will be no matter what; but, fool me once...shame on you: fool me twice...shame on me: fool me thrice...you pathetic fool, am I right? I must actually take comfort in the sin of pride...who knew I actually had some? (May 26, 2009)
(originally posted to That Other Journal on January 14, 2009)
Thursday, January 8, 2009
SOMEONE MIGHT BE MAKING MONEY OFF THIS...
If there's a pool going on amongst my friends regarding how many days of peace I get between fights with my Best Friend, the winner this time will be the one(s) who bet.......one day. Wow.
This lovely ditty is brought to you by her lazy ass not taking out garbage that was clearly full in both the kitchen and bathroom and not even considering taking out the cardboard box my non-Malm Ikea chair came in. I only carried it in and assembled it. I didn't feel like going out in the rain to throw it away...sue me. Considering the way my life has gone, where does this unbridled optimism come from in me? I don't get it. You'd think I'd be so thoroughly defeated by her (and life) by now, that I'd just know better than to hope, but nope...the dope got sprinkled with fairy dust again...*sigh* Her reasoning as to why she, in the three hours she was home (and I was sleeping getting back on to my night schedule), that she could not take out the cardboard box (at the very least) was that she was coming inside and not going back out so that it would be inconvenient for her. Well, duh, but that's not an excuse not to do it and lay on your bed with your laptop fucking around on Facebook. When I get in these moments, I inevitably make it worse by reminding her how she hasn't once taken the garbage out with her (when she's going out and it'd be "convenient" for her) when she leaves in the morning. If she wasn't too busy yelling at me to come up with an excuse, I'd venture that she'd be too much in a hurry in the morning to do it anyway. I also inquired as to why she didn't do the dishes (it's generally my job since I do the cooking...not that she's ever done the dishes on the rare occasion that she's cooked for us and for herself). I figure once in a while would be a gesture of appreciation that I cook for her daily and that she benefits from that fact. But I could never get that out because her argument tactic, yelling without taking a breath and not listening so that even if you do get a word in, it won't matter, took over. She stopped listening at you, do, and dishes. At this point, I'm leaving for work. I have my bag in one hand and a fistful of garbage bags in the other so I didn't take the cardboard (her reasoning being, that since I'm passing by the bin anyway, I may as well do it -- a fair reason I'll admit, but as this argument was about her lack of participation in the minor chores of this apartment, it didn't matter. And for those of you wondering, in her mind, this was all about a cardboard box and nothing else). Anyway, as I'm leaving (we're still both yelling at each other), she grabs the box and throws it down the stairs at me. That would've been it, but unfortunately, it was overcast so I had to return for my umbrella. She, of course, did not move the cardboard so I could barely open the door. I call to my Best Friend for assistance and I forgot exactly what she said, but it resulted in her going back up the stairs without the box so I, like a maniac, had to repeatedly smash the door into the box until I had enough space to squeeze through and get the umbrella.
*think Spongebob Squarepants* (Ninety minutes earlier.....)
My Best Friend wakes me at 7:30 (Alarm was set for 8) wondering when I would be making dinner. Already this day was starting off well... I get up, see the cardboard box still in the living room and the dishes from yesterday still in the sink. I would've done these in the afternoon like normal, but as I said before, I had to get back into my night schedule so I was sleeping late (I have to sleep a half a night's sleep Tuesday night and then do the other half Wednesday afternoon to do this. I'm not keeping my night schedule on my days off in case anyone needs to talk to me or wants to see me). Either way, I take out the shell steaks from the refrigerator and make some rice and corn and do the dishes while they're broiling. My Best Friend finds out I'm cooking a real dinner and that she didn't want to eat so much so late adding that she didn't want to lay in bed full thinking about how fat she's getting and would've made something for herself earlier had she known. How observant of her not to notice the rather large package of meat in the refrigerator and more importantly...WHY THE HELL DID SHE THEN WAKE ME UP IF SHE DIDN'T WANT TO EAT SO MUCH SO LATE?! HOLY SHHHIT! One steak was noticeably larger than the other. I was gonna take that one not only because of her earlier remark, but also because she has a history of not eating as much as I do for dinner. But no, she took the big steak. I gave her less corn than me for the same reason only to get a complaint about that too from Miss Inconsistent. I gave her less rice than me cuz I know she doesn't really like rice. It was a genuine miracle that last night of all nights she did not want more rice than she got. *angelic chorus* And yes, those dishes remain on the stove and in the sink for those who made last minute bets.
For those of you betting that the cardboard would still be at the door when I got back home, you lose. I know, I'm scared too. She actually cleared it away and put it in the appropriate dumpster outside. Did she actually have a ping of conscience? There's that optimism again.....fuck.
On the plus side (yes there is one), I actually found $15 at work tonight. The last time we fought, I found $10. I have to admit, I'm tempted to fight again tonight. :-p
(originally posted to That Other Journal on January 8, 2009)
This lovely ditty is brought to you by her lazy ass not taking out garbage that was clearly full in both the kitchen and bathroom and not even considering taking out the cardboard box my non-Malm Ikea chair came in. I only carried it in and assembled it. I didn't feel like going out in the rain to throw it away...sue me. Considering the way my life has gone, where does this unbridled optimism come from in me? I don't get it. You'd think I'd be so thoroughly defeated by her (and life) by now, that I'd just know better than to hope, but nope...the dope got sprinkled with fairy dust again...*sigh* Her reasoning as to why she, in the three hours she was home (and I was sleeping getting back on to my night schedule), that she could not take out the cardboard box (at the very least) was that she was coming inside and not going back out so that it would be inconvenient for her. Well, duh, but that's not an excuse not to do it and lay on your bed with your laptop fucking around on Facebook. When I get in these moments, I inevitably make it worse by reminding her how she hasn't once taken the garbage out with her (when she's going out and it'd be "convenient" for her) when she leaves in the morning. If she wasn't too busy yelling at me to come up with an excuse, I'd venture that she'd be too much in a hurry in the morning to do it anyway. I also inquired as to why she didn't do the dishes (it's generally my job since I do the cooking...not that she's ever done the dishes on the rare occasion that she's cooked for us and for herself). I figure once in a while would be a gesture of appreciation that I cook for her daily and that she benefits from that fact. But I could never get that out because her argument tactic, yelling without taking a breath and not listening so that even if you do get a word in, it won't matter, took over. She stopped listening at you, do, and dishes. At this point, I'm leaving for work. I have my bag in one hand and a fistful of garbage bags in the other so I didn't take the cardboard (her reasoning being, that since I'm passing by the bin anyway, I may as well do it -- a fair reason I'll admit, but as this argument was about her lack of participation in the minor chores of this apartment, it didn't matter. And for those of you wondering, in her mind, this was all about a cardboard box and nothing else). Anyway, as I'm leaving (we're still both yelling at each other), she grabs the box and throws it down the stairs at me. That would've been it, but unfortunately, it was overcast so I had to return for my umbrella. She, of course, did not move the cardboard so I could barely open the door. I call to my Best Friend for assistance and I forgot exactly what she said, but it resulted in her going back up the stairs without the box so I, like a maniac, had to repeatedly smash the door into the box until I had enough space to squeeze through and get the umbrella.
My Best Friend wakes me at 7:30 (Alarm was set for 8) wondering when I would be making dinner. Already this day was starting off well... I get up, see the cardboard box still in the living room and the dishes from yesterday still in the sink. I would've done these in the afternoon like normal, but as I said before, I had to get back into my night schedule so I was sleeping late (I have to sleep a half a night's sleep Tuesday night and then do the other half Wednesday afternoon to do this. I'm not keeping my night schedule on my days off in case anyone needs to talk to me or wants to see me). Either way, I take out the shell steaks from the refrigerator and make some rice and corn and do the dishes while they're broiling. My Best Friend finds out I'm cooking a real dinner and that she didn't want to eat so much so late adding that she didn't want to lay in bed full thinking about how fat she's getting and would've made something for herself earlier had she known. How observant of her not to notice the rather large package of meat in the refrigerator and more importantly...WHY THE HELL DID SHE THEN WAKE ME UP IF SHE DIDN'T WANT TO EAT SO MUCH SO LATE?! HOLY SHHHIT! One steak was noticeably larger than the other. I was gonna take that one not only because of her earlier remark, but also because she has a history of not eating as much as I do for dinner. But no, she took the big steak. I gave her less corn than me for the same reason only to get a complaint about that too from Miss Inconsistent. I gave her less rice than me cuz I know she doesn't really like rice. It was a genuine miracle that last night of all nights she did not want more rice than she got. *angelic chorus* And yes, those dishes remain on the stove and in the sink for those who made last minute bets.
For those of you betting that the cardboard would still be at the door when I got back home, you lose. I know, I'm scared too. She actually cleared it away and put it in the appropriate dumpster outside. Did she actually have a ping of conscience? There's that optimism again.....fuck.
On the plus side (yes there is one), I actually found $15 at work tonight. The last time we fought, I found $10. I have to admit, I'm tempted to fight again tonight. :-p
(originally posted to That Other Journal on January 8, 2009)
Wednesday, January 7, 2009
I HOPE YOU CAN SEE THE HUMOR IN THIS...
I've been doing what I can to eliminate animal products in the snacks and peripheral foods (e.g. pasta sauce) I buy. That's not to say that this hasn't had its share of annoyances. I like doughnuts! And apple puffs! And waffles! And Bisquick sucks! All these things contain at least an egg and/or milk. It's not that I won't eat these things anymore...if I'm served some at a gathering or whatever, I'll happily chow down on 'em. Like I've said, it's about limitation, not elimination. Thankfully, there's enough "happens to be vegan" snack foods out there that I don't feel like I'm missing too much.
The other day, I had to buy spaghetti sauce and read the ingredients only to find out that they contain meat and/or cheese so I'm like, "Oh, I can't get this, can't get the vegetable one cuz it still has cheese, etc." I was happy to have finally stumbled upon marinara sauce which seemed to be what I was looking for and then I blithely went to the frozen foods aisles to pick up beef and cheese tortellini to make with this sauce. I feel like the stereotypical fat man ordering the diet coke to go with his feeds four dinner...*mocking voice* cuz he's trying to watch his weight.
I did look for a bag of ready-made veggie "meat"balls to mix half and half with the real ones to see if I'd notice, but my supermarket doesn't sell any so that experiment will have to wait. My feeties hurt after a week of walking and standing at work so I'm not exactly eager to go travelling about my area on my days off to look for that does sell those things. :-)
(originally posted to That Other Journal on January 7, 2009)
The other day, I had to buy spaghetti sauce and read the ingredients only to find out that they contain meat and/or cheese so I'm like, "Oh, I can't get this, can't get the vegetable one cuz it still has cheese, etc." I was happy to have finally stumbled upon marinara sauce which seemed to be what I was looking for and then I blithely went to the frozen foods aisles to pick up beef and cheese tortellini to make with this sauce. I feel like the stereotypical fat man ordering the diet coke to go with his feeds four dinner...*mocking voice* cuz he's trying to watch his weight.
I did look for a bag of ready-made veggie "meat"balls to mix half and half with the real ones to see if I'd notice, but my supermarket doesn't sell any so that experiment will have to wait. My feeties hurt after a week of walking and standing at work so I'm not exactly eager to go travelling about my area on my days off to look for that does sell those things. :-)
(originally posted to That Other Journal on January 7, 2009)
IKEA
Is it possible to assemble any piece of Ikea furniture without
putting on at least one piece backwards? At least this chair didn't have
dowels and cam bolts.....so I guess that's a plus.
And for those of you keeping score, it was $39.99 plus tax.
Your Malm's box
(originally posted to That Other Journal on January 7, 2009)
And for those of you keeping score, it was $39.99 plus tax.
Your Malm's box
(originally posted to That Other Journal on January 7, 2009)
Monday, January 5, 2009
STUPID LIBRA II
I'm just doing this off the top of my head instead of what I usually do which is prepare :-)
Despite recent rants, my Best Friend has been my friend since I was a senior in high school back in October 1995. We've got a lot of history. We've had our assorted ups and downs and we've had many adventures together. In addition, we've also become quite adept at getting on each other's nerves. This is not a recent development brought about by our new lives together in this apartment. I have memories of hanging up the phone on her back in college. We had one fight so bad that I didn't talk to her for about two months (much easier to do when you're not living with each other). I don't even remember how we started fighting that time, but I do remember hanging up the phone on her as it was quite satisfying. Our argument devolved to the point where my Best Friend was telling me things like, "Why can't you talk like Pulp Fiction does (a friend of hers at the time)? Why can't you give advice like Pulp Fiction? Pulp Fiction always gives good advice. Why can't you be deep like Pulp Fiction?" and so on like that until I got so frustrated that I said, "Then why don't you fucking call Pulp Fiction?" and hung up on her. Back then, I was furious. In hindsight, I find it hilarious. We've always had this unwritten rule that whoever hangs up on the other is automatically "wrong" and must be the next one to call. We've each hung up on each other numerous times over the years and it's always been like that. I've always liked that approach. I always looked at hanging up the phone on someone as the rough equivalent of turning over the checkerboard when you're losing. You flip over the checkerboard, you have to do the make-good. My Best Friend and I have that mutual understanding and I've always appreciated that about her.
When she's in a good mood (which is more often than I let on), she has this charming goofiness about her that I personally find adorable. She's truly a joy to be around when she's feeling carefree. And it's always the most silly stuff -- out of context TV quotes, verses from obscure songs ("Banapple Gas" anyone?), odd drawings (some of which are actually funny -- I remember one she drew of a girl getting caught cheating by her boyfriend. She says to the boyfriend, "But honey, I swear I was thinking of you the whole time!"), etc. Since living with her, I've also learned that she likes singing in the shower. Not for real singing, just occasional lines of verse done without a care as to who's listening. I don't care nor do I know if it's in key or not, but it makes me smile and/or giggle to hear it.
This one's dumb, I admit, but my Best Friend's also the only person I have ever met who remembers a television show called Turkey TV which aired on Nickelodeon back in the mid-80's. It was also fun singing the theme to Hey Dude! together.
My Best Friend values my opinion and my advice (when she asks for it at least! :-D) and not just because I'm the easiest to get a hold of. This isn't something she's ever told me. This is one of those things I've found out about by happy accident such as overhearing a phone call to someone who's never met me and hearing her praise me for listening and giving her advice she's actually putting to use. I've even overheard her defending to those who have met me. We fight a lot, but she also knows me quite well. Even at times when my Best Friend had more friends than she could handle, she would never forget about me and back when we lived far apart, she would make sure that I met her friends whenever we were together. Admittedly this has been difficult since I've begun working overnights in retail (who has off on Mondays and Tuesdays to hang out?), but whenever an opportunity arose, she made sure I was there like her birthday last year.
I also really appreciate that my Best Friend wants me around for even the most mundane of outings like window shopping at the mall or even just to hang out a little bit while her car's oil gets changed. This is one of the few things that have never slowed down during our long friendship. Many days I've felt lonely and unwanted and never told my Best Friend that I was so and was secretly made happy that she was in the area, would give me a call, and asked if I would like to accompany her to the mall (or some other store) and bring some emotional relief to an otherwise depressing afternoon. I was always happy to be included as I've spent far too many days not being. How many people have I spoken to since moving back to New Jersey? It's been almost ten years and again, I've yet to break into anyone's circle of friends. I've yet to get a casual invite anywhere. If I don't say hello first to the people around my age, I never hear anything. The only people who talk to me at all are either married or are in committed relationships. Otherwise, I get the perfunctory hello from those who work my shift and that's it. That's how it's been. The single girls are always curiously silent at work and the guys my age have no interest in having me hang out with them either. The Security Guard seems to like talking to me so I should watch my tongue; but we've yet to hang out despite casual promises to do so (I've heard that several times before from several different people so my hopes are not up). But I could always call my Best Friend.
My Best Friend and I also tend to hate many of the same things. It's an odd way to bond, but I must admit, that it's a very satisfying one. We have very vicious ways of looking at certain things, and knowing that she doesn't get turned off by the worst of my thoughts (nor does she judge me negatively for them either) is very comforting. I truly appreciate that I can share the blackness of my soul with her and I also appreciate that she trusts me with the dark side of her soul as well.
I also like that I've known her so long that I have to actually remember that there was a time we didn't know each other. I'm proud to have such thoughts. It's wonderful to experience that kind of forgetfulness!
My Best Friend and I are truly siblings, if not by blood then by heart. The greatest comfort of all that she gives me is that no matter how much we fight, we know that we'll never abandon the other. Every one of you who has a brother and/or sister should know what I'm talking about. With my Best Friend, I'll take it all. Believe me, I'd much rather have the good be greater than the bad and I'd rather not complain about her as much as I do, but she's still my friend...warts and all.
That's what I've got off the top of my head. I'll add to it later if I feel like it.
(originally posted to That Other Journal on January 5, 2009)
Despite recent rants, my Best Friend has been my friend since I was a senior in high school back in October 1995. We've got a lot of history. We've had our assorted ups and downs and we've had many adventures together. In addition, we've also become quite adept at getting on each other's nerves. This is not a recent development brought about by our new lives together in this apartment. I have memories of hanging up the phone on her back in college. We had one fight so bad that I didn't talk to her for about two months (much easier to do when you're not living with each other). I don't even remember how we started fighting that time, but I do remember hanging up the phone on her as it was quite satisfying. Our argument devolved to the point where my Best Friend was telling me things like, "Why can't you talk like Pulp Fiction does (a friend of hers at the time)? Why can't you give advice like Pulp Fiction? Pulp Fiction always gives good advice. Why can't you be deep like Pulp Fiction?" and so on like that until I got so frustrated that I said, "Then why don't you fucking call Pulp Fiction?" and hung up on her. Back then, I was furious. In hindsight, I find it hilarious. We've always had this unwritten rule that whoever hangs up on the other is automatically "wrong" and must be the next one to call. We've each hung up on each other numerous times over the years and it's always been like that. I've always liked that approach. I always looked at hanging up the phone on someone as the rough equivalent of turning over the checkerboard when you're losing. You flip over the checkerboard, you have to do the make-good. My Best Friend and I have that mutual understanding and I've always appreciated that about her.
When she's in a good mood (which is more often than I let on), she has this charming goofiness about her that I personally find adorable. She's truly a joy to be around when she's feeling carefree. And it's always the most silly stuff -- out of context TV quotes, verses from obscure songs ("Banapple Gas" anyone?), odd drawings (some of which are actually funny -- I remember one she drew of a girl getting caught cheating by her boyfriend. She says to the boyfriend, "But honey, I swear I was thinking of you the whole time!"), etc. Since living with her, I've also learned that she likes singing in the shower. Not for real singing, just occasional lines of verse done without a care as to who's listening. I don't care nor do I know if it's in key or not, but it makes me smile and/or giggle to hear it.
This one's dumb, I admit, but my Best Friend's also the only person I have ever met who remembers a television show called Turkey TV which aired on Nickelodeon back in the mid-80's. It was also fun singing the theme to Hey Dude! together.
My Best Friend values my opinion and my advice (when she asks for it at least! :-D) and not just because I'm the easiest to get a hold of. This isn't something she's ever told me. This is one of those things I've found out about by happy accident such as overhearing a phone call to someone who's never met me and hearing her praise me for listening and giving her advice she's actually putting to use. I've even overheard her defending to those who have met me. We fight a lot, but she also knows me quite well. Even at times when my Best Friend had more friends than she could handle, she would never forget about me and back when we lived far apart, she would make sure that I met her friends whenever we were together. Admittedly this has been difficult since I've begun working overnights in retail (who has off on Mondays and Tuesdays to hang out?), but whenever an opportunity arose, she made sure I was there like her birthday last year.
I also really appreciate that my Best Friend wants me around for even the most mundane of outings like window shopping at the mall or even just to hang out a little bit while her car's oil gets changed. This is one of the few things that have never slowed down during our long friendship. Many days I've felt lonely and unwanted and never told my Best Friend that I was so and was secretly made happy that she was in the area, would give me a call, and asked if I would like to accompany her to the mall (or some other store) and bring some emotional relief to an otherwise depressing afternoon. I was always happy to be included as I've spent far too many days not being. How many people have I spoken to since moving back to New Jersey? It's been almost ten years and again, I've yet to break into anyone's circle of friends. I've yet to get a casual invite anywhere. If I don't say hello first to the people around my age, I never hear anything. The only people who talk to me at all are either married or are in committed relationships. Otherwise, I get the perfunctory hello from those who work my shift and that's it. That's how it's been. The single girls are always curiously silent at work and the guys my age have no interest in having me hang out with them either. The Security Guard seems to like talking to me so I should watch my tongue; but we've yet to hang out despite casual promises to do so (I've heard that several times before from several different people so my hopes are not up). But I could always call my Best Friend.
My Best Friend and I also tend to hate many of the same things. It's an odd way to bond, but I must admit, that it's a very satisfying one. We have very vicious ways of looking at certain things, and knowing that she doesn't get turned off by the worst of my thoughts (nor does she judge me negatively for them either) is very comforting. I truly appreciate that I can share the blackness of my soul with her and I also appreciate that she trusts me with the dark side of her soul as well.
I also like that I've known her so long that I have to actually remember that there was a time we didn't know each other. I'm proud to have such thoughts. It's wonderful to experience that kind of forgetfulness!
My Best Friend and I are truly siblings, if not by blood then by heart. The greatest comfort of all that she gives me is that no matter how much we fight, we know that we'll never abandon the other. Every one of you who has a brother and/or sister should know what I'm talking about. With my Best Friend, I'll take it all. Believe me, I'd much rather have the good be greater than the bad and I'd rather not complain about her as much as I do, but she's still my friend...warts and all.
That's what I've got off the top of my head. I'll add to it later if I feel like it.
(originally posted to That Other Journal on January 5, 2009)
Friday, January 2, 2009
ADDENDUM
I wasn't looking forward to coming home...dealing with the inevitable and all, but...she wasn't home. Win! Now I'm merely delaying the inevitable. :-)
I also found $10 at work. Double win!
So...I guess that means 2009 has started with a wash. :-p
(originally posted to That Other Journal on January 2, 2009)
I also found $10 at work. Double win!
So...I guess that means 2009 has started with a wash. :-p
(originally posted to That Other Journal on January 2, 2009)
Thursday, January 1, 2009
I'M STARTING TO THINK SHE'S THE WICKED QUEEN...
I'm being punished right now. I was invited to my Best Friend's grandparents (by her parents) for a New Year's Day dinner. Instead, I'm composing on That Other Journal while eating Ritz crackers instead of the planned turkey dinner. About a half hour before we were supposed to leave, my Best Friend was showing me pictures that she had taken last night with her new friend Tank Girl trying to get my opinion, but not of whether the picture is good, well-taken, properly lit or framed, or anything artistically critical -- no, the goal was whether or not she (Best Friend) was the best-looking in the picture. That went expectedly -- no real arguments. Thanks to Tank Girl, my Best Friend got exposed to the kind of wealth and status that she feels she deserves...good for her to finally have a friend she can use with useful connections. Somehow, me telling her about how I'm uncomfortable around that kind of wealth and saying that I'd probably never visit her if she lived in the kind of mansion she described morphed into her putting down my Brother's Fiancée (there are definitely some steps leading up to this...I can't remember them all...I remember it having to do with beauty again). My Best Friend has a problem with girls in general and is especially jealous of girls who get a lot of attention but aren't as pretty as she is. She's kinda okay with being compared to Little Doll as she finds her of comparable attractiveness. She, however, finds my Brother's Fiancée decidedly not so.
I didn't exactly defend her wisely, I'll admit. But still, by putting my Brother's Fiancée down, she's putting my Brother down and I'm not gonna stand for that. After my Best Friend criticized her looks and personality (all from one meeting during my birthday), I pointed out that my Brother's Fiancée's personality is much better than hers and that a strong personality trumps looks (like my Best Friend's) every time. I said that if they both went out together that while initially my Best Friend would probably get the attention, that by the end of the night, my Brother's Fiancée would be surrounded (and that she would be alone -- never got to get that part out as I would now be getting yelled at until the front door slammed -- I say front door like we have more than one way out of this apartment). I do admit to saying that my Best Friend has a horrible personality (by which I meant that she's way too into herself, selfish, and ungiving -- never got to explain that either...not that it woulda helped anything).
I think at this point, all her words would be yelled at me and that I was silent. She told me she doesn't need friends like me (I bit my tongue and didn't tell her that I'm her friend, but that she's not mine -- I can't talk to her...I don't ever remember being able to) and that because of what I had said, that I would not be going to her grandparents' home for dinner (like she was the one who invited me) so I got undressed, back into my pajamas, got some Ritz and a Pepsi, and started this entry.
ADDENDUM: I never got my computer chair for Christmas. I doubt I'll ever get one now unless I pay for it. Before today, though, she didn't want to get the ones she was looking at because they were expensive (that is, over $100). She, to my face, said that she was gonna get something cheaper (never mind that I paid almost $170 for a camera, which was practically extortion money to begin with as I was tired of her using mine and that she has only once ever gotten me anything for Christmas).
And since I'm mad, anyone interested in defending her should note that my Best Friend has insulted each and every one of you here. I'm not gonna repeat it here but you should be able to infer it. So to all my weird, ugly, loser friends...and the married one whom I'm having an affair with, goodnight! (oh did I just say that?)
One of these days, I'll make an entry about the things I actually like about my Best Friend even to this day, but not today.
(originally posted to That Other Journal on January 1, 2009)
I didn't exactly defend her wisely, I'll admit. But still, by putting my Brother's Fiancée down, she's putting my Brother down and I'm not gonna stand for that. After my Best Friend criticized her looks and personality (all from one meeting during my birthday), I pointed out that my Brother's Fiancée's personality is much better than hers and that a strong personality trumps looks (like my Best Friend's) every time. I said that if they both went out together that while initially my Best Friend would probably get the attention, that by the end of the night, my Brother's Fiancée would be surrounded (and that she would be alone -- never got to get that part out as I would now be getting yelled at until the front door slammed -- I say front door like we have more than one way out of this apartment). I do admit to saying that my Best Friend has a horrible personality (by which I meant that she's way too into herself, selfish, and ungiving -- never got to explain that either...not that it woulda helped anything).
I think at this point, all her words would be yelled at me and that I was silent. She told me she doesn't need friends like me (I bit my tongue and didn't tell her that I'm her friend, but that she's not mine -- I can't talk to her...I don't ever remember being able to) and that because of what I had said, that I would not be going to her grandparents' home for dinner (like she was the one who invited me) so I got undressed, back into my pajamas, got some Ritz and a Pepsi, and started this entry.
ADDENDUM: I never got my computer chair for Christmas. I doubt I'll ever get one now unless I pay for it. Before today, though, she didn't want to get the ones she was looking at because they were expensive (that is, over $100). She, to my face, said that she was gonna get something cheaper (never mind that I paid almost $170 for a camera, which was practically extortion money to begin with as I was tired of her using mine and that she has only once ever gotten me anything for Christmas).
And since I'm mad, anyone interested in defending her should note that my Best Friend has insulted each and every one of you here. I'm not gonna repeat it here but you should be able to infer it. So to all my weird, ugly, loser friends...and the married one whom I'm having an affair with, goodnight! (oh did I just say that?)
One of these days, I'll make an entry about the things I actually like about my Best Friend even to this day, but not today.
(originally posted to That Other Journal on January 1, 2009)