I don't celebrate either Mother's or Father's Day and that's not because I don't believe in the holiday or that I'm opposed to it on quasi-religious grounds or because I stand in solidarity with the holiday's creator Anna Jarvis's opposition to the holiday's commercialization or even because I am holding the holidays hostage until I am able to secure a girlfriend who can successfully guilt me into doing something about after all these years [though I will admit that would likely be a most powerful motivator]. No, it's because, quite simply, I am an asshole. I won't make excuses for it. This however, has not stopped me from thinking about how the holiday might be better (or at least more reasonably) done.
My proposal may or may not be related to what other cultures may or may not already be doing. I don't know, I'm not researching. My proposal would also not fly commercially as it has no set nationally recognized day to give greeting card, flower, and restaurant companies a dependable single-day boost in revenue. Just as your birthday is celebrated more or less personally on the day you were actually born, a woman becomes a mother on the day her (first) child is born, thus your birthday is also a mother's day. Now what I would be proposing is more of a passing-the-torch type celebration. I figure since we legally become adults at eighteen in this country, that eighteen would also be the last year your birthday would be celebrated as your birthday. Now that you are an adult, you would, for the rest of her life, honor your mother on your birthday, her mother's day, instead. Just as children grow out of Santa Claus, so to would you outgrow your parents' recognition of your birthday. The day could be celebrated more-or-less as it is now or more preferably, customized to her situation ultimately reflecting gratitude for the life you have both received and have had nurtured throughout childhood.
If you are an only child, you would honor Father's Day on the same day. A Parents' Day if you will. Otherwise, I would think Father's Day would be the obligation of the second child (on that child's birthday despite the fact he became a father upon the birth of the first child). I say this because I can't help but feel this holiday as naturally matriarchal much like the word "widow" is naturally feminine (in that it requires an ending to make it masculine [widower] whereas other nouns [at least in languages which reflect gender more readily] take endings to make them feminine [actor : actress // der Freund : die Freundin // le voisin : la voisine].) leaving Father's Day to be naturally secondary in importance despite the far more typical patriarchal setup with regards to the ruling classes. Subsequent children would be absolved of these duties and instead take upon these roles should their elder brethren die, are no longer capable of performing their duty, or could instead be given the more general "Parents' Day" obligation. I personally favor absolution though as large families might make multiple yearly celebrations look tacky/excessive from a neighbor's perspective though I would totally expect the tradition to be inherited as already described.
If there are other cultures which already do anything resembling what I've already described, then great, I would then feel justified in bearing such thoughts. Otherwise this way of doing things seems more logical to me. I tend to feel it proper to keep what amounts to personal celebrations personal. I can see how the guilt in opposing this holiday can come about. It's far too easy to be accused of hating mothers making it impossible to oppose such a holiday on principle. So we're stuck with it even though I think most people would find it odd if we chose not to celebrate individual birthdays but rather celebrated everybody's birthday on an assigned day each year.
I could go on if I were both not really hungry right now and had actually made notes before typing but I won't, opting instead to end this mild rant here...
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