Wednesday, June 20, 2012

LINE OF THE DAY, part XXVIII

     I am not a fan of zombie movies in the sense that I have not watched them, but from what I've read about them, especially on Cracked, I doubt I would the genre especially entertaining and would probably view it along the lines of the linked article. That being said, Huntert commented on Ian Fortey's Cracked article, "6 Things That Never Make Sense About Zombie Movies" thusly:

If you imagine the causative agent of the zombie pandemic as being a virus or some sort of parasitic infection, most of your issues can be resolved.

6. Why don't zombies ever finish their meal? Any organism or agent that invades a host does so for one reason, and one reason only: to propagate and to ensure the survival of its genetic lineage. There are many interesting real-world examples of how infective agents can use its host to not only to complete it's life cycle, but to facilitate its passage into other hosts (a great example is toxoplasmosis) In the case of the zombie, like most deadly diseases left untreated, infection leads to the eventual death of the host. At the moment of death, the agent hijacks what's left of host's nervous system, gaining control of basic motor functions and sensory perceptions and uses them to gain entry into other hosts. Thus, the host's sole purpose at this point is to pass on the infection. You can reason that one or two chunks of flesh is all that is needed to accomplish this task. There is no real "
hunger" for flesh. It's only the need to pass on the infection.

5. Why are they chasing the most dangerous game? Many infectious organisms/agents tend to be species specific meaning that they will typically only infect one type of host. Plasmodium falciparum, the parasite that causes malaria, only infects humans; Neospora caninum only infects dogs. Much of this preference has to do with the resources needed to be drawn from the host. The human body probably offers the zombie agent vital nutrients that can't be supplied by other hosts, which might explain why other animals can't be infected (yet. mutations can change this).

4. How do they know anything? They don't. The host is dead. The agent is in complete control of the nervous system. It probably uses the host's sense of smell to pick up on chemical cues given off by living bodies in order to track them. And you're right. Since the host is dead, it's only a matter of time before decomposition gets the better of them, so all zombies have a shelf life.

3. Where does the food go? I would say that most zombies don't gorge on human flesh. One or two bites, and they move on. However, the few that do take bigger portions end up filling their stomachs faster, and as referenced in W[orld]W[ar]Z, since their digestive system don't function anymore, their stomachs would explode. Another theory: It's a well known fact that after death, a person evacuates their bowels. This is because they lose control of their sphincter muscles. So it's possible that everything a zombie eats will pass right through them.

2. Can you really cure that? There is no cure for death.

1. Then what? If zombies kill everyone, the infection would also be wiped out. Life will find a way to continue without the human species.

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