I'm still coming out of it: some lingering itchiness and occasional sneezes still but I'm coming out of it. I've had what may or may not be a severe allergic response since last Friday night. Again with the same symptoms of an itchy left nostril, copious amounts of may-as-well-be-tears mucous, and violent sneezing fits. The new magic number seems to be six...six sneezes in a row before it finally gives up...each sneeze more violent than the last. I actually pulled a muscle just above my pelvis on my right side sneezing so hard and on Sunday I was holding on to a railing while sneezing and pulled a muscle in my left arm as well. Both are feeling fine now, but it's (sarcastically) good to know I'm capable of that. I wonder how long it'll be before I crack a rib or two doing that? The one (sarcastically again) fun new one was this sensation of electricity crackling all over my face, nostrils, and hair as though I were building up a static charge that would release itself in a cascade of exhausting sneezes which make my fingertips go momentarily numb and disorient me. I love my life! (yes, that was also sarcastic)
Still, I go through the same shit when people see me like that. I've had these sneezing fits and runny discharge since I was eighteen. Yay! Fourteen years of this shit. We all just assumed they were allergies...a present from my body now that I had reached adulthood. It was usually treated with the go-sleepy-now medication diphenhydramine hydrochloride better known as Benadryl. I don't think it ever actually worked, I think just going to sleep for a while allowing my body to calm the fuck down is what was doing it. Yet, people still suggest I take this allergy medication or that one or this home remedy with no science to back it up or some other miscellaneous proposal. I can't explain it to people and I'm sorry to all those whom I have snapped at over the years in frustration. I'm not actually mad at you, I swear. It's just maddening, is all.
I get all sorts of suggestions to stop my sneezing and I have to tell people that there is in fact no such medication. There is no pill or elixir (short of a bullet or cyanide) that stops sneezing and I'll go on the record saying this is probably a good thing despite how frustrating sneezures can be. I'm sure ONCE in a while, sneezes do serve a valuable, potentially lifesaving purpose. Figuring I should probably have science backing up my angry rants, I went online to search for proof of this assertion that my former allergist had already told me. I learned fun new words like rhinorrhea (snot folks!) and pruritus (intense itching laymen!) in addition to stumbling upon a diagnosis that immediately distracted me from my goal called "Nonallergic Rhinitis" aka "Vasomotor Rhinitis" aka "Idiopathic Rhinitis". Hmmm...what could that possibly be?
Read for yourself why don't you? Go ahead. I'll wait...
You see, I'm a bit obsessive when it comes to people and things which annoy me and going into annoying sneezing fits seemingly at random is something that I would pay attention to in detail in an effort to isolate a cause. I understand the pathology of it well from start to finish. While I'm tempted to conclude that it is ultimately a sickness since the day after I last showed symptoms my...uh, rhinorrhea is discolored like it is when I'm sick, I find it odd that the progression of the symptoms is identical each time which points me back to an allergic reaction. After all, have you ever had an identical illness? No, probably not. I doubt you've paid attention to them, but you'd've noticed that each cold has its own fingerprint of misery which it inflicts on you. You'd've also noticed that your whole body gets in on the act be it aches and pains or a fever or chills or stuffy nose or runny nose or thick mucous discharge or general weakness or any one (or even all!) those symptoms with varying degrees of strength associated with them. Not this reaction...it's just in the nose. My body only gets weak from the amount of energy it puts into sneezing and producing the runny snot and I do get hungry when I get that way.
The thing is, while I know from scratch tests that I'm allergic to cat dander, cat dander does not make me sneeze. If I pet a cat and then scratch my arm, the arm will well up where I scratched or if I rub my eye, my eye will itch a bit (but not intensely), but that's it. I don't get a runny nose and I certainly don't sneeze and believe me, I'm weird. I've held my cats to me and inhaled. Cats smell weird, but they don't make me sneeze. I'm pretty much not allergic to anything else. The only thing else I've gotten reactions to is the crud that accumulates under the registers at work. If I accidentally scratch myself on anything under there, I get an itchy welt that persists for up to a week, but that might be an actual infection and not an allergic reaction as my cat dander hives don't turn red.
No, the only trigger I can pinpoint with some sense of confidence is a lack of adequate rest over a period of (usually three) days. I'm guessing that produces the yawning which produces the tears which drain into my nose which cause me to sniffle until "something" goes wrong and I start getting this feeling like a bump in my left nostril rubbing against something the wrong way (almost like an ingrown hair) that causes more sniffles and mucous production which ultimately manifests as sneezing fits (sneezures) which last anywhere from one to three days (may have to up that to four, possibly five depending on how I feel when I wake up later today). Now perhaps that "feeling" in my left nostril is a polyp: I don't know because I don't know what a polyp looks/feels like but it's the only alternative I can't definitively rule out by myself.
The only other possible trigger is significant rainfall in the preceding day. This current one, we had like three inches of rain. However, the preceding one, rainfall did not happen although there was a significant temperature drop which was listed under that possible causes. But I'm not confident of either of these possibilities: they seem more like red herrings to me. Of the other possible symptoms I can rule out alcohol and spicy foods straight away. I did scratch my arm after handling newspapers with no effect. Strong emotions are probable but given that I've gone through numerous downs (and occasional ups!) without any "allergic response" to it, I'd have to say they're a non-factor as well. Barometric changes is interesting. I'd need a weather history for my area with that level of detail to rule that out. (I just did. Inconclusive. Seven months ago, the pressure was relatively constant while there was a stunning change just last Thursday preceding the storm). Bright lights I'd have to rule out since I'm under them constantly after coming in from walking in darkness for forty minutes. And while perfumes and cigarette smoke annoy me, they don't affect me like that either and I can vouch for that having been around cigarette smoke for years and having had numerous women (including one who was probably hitting on me...crap! another name for the list! I forgot about her till just now! Hey, she used to know one of my cousins...Facebook, you're so awesome...now find me my high school crush goddamnit!!!) who were heavily perfumed.
Anyhow, while nonallergic rhinitis is a diagnosis of exclusion, I feel compelled to accept it. How frustrating is that? What is sounds like is basically, my body's just going into sneezing fits for the hell of it. My immune system just wants attention because it has so little to do. It's throwing a tantrum and believe me, I wish I could give in to it (where's an aerosolizer with rhinoviruses in the solution when you need one?). Nonallergic rhinitis sounds autoimmune to me. Great, even my own body rejects me... It's great to know what it possibly is but it sucks even more to know that nothing can be done about it except for extreme solutions that I must (unfortunately) always reject like cutting off my nose and going for the Lord Voldemort look or moistening a Q-tip in nitric acid and burning the accursed itchy area away (I could still smell with my right nostril so it's not like it'd be a total loss, right?).
You really do get some medieval thoughts going through your head when you get this way. :-)
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