ONE MORE AND THEN I WILL GET TO WHAT I SUPPOSED TO HAVE DONE THREE HOURS AGO...

     OKCupid is doing a Christmas-themed gimmick sending me "12 Matches of Christmas"...one per day for twelve days. I was stunned...stunned I tells ya, that this site for the first time actually recommended someone for me whom I am interested in meeting, immediately attracted to, and within distance of - the trifecta. Usually I have found such women through my own searches. She's also the first woman on this site in my five months of being on it who made me go, "Whoa..." Thank goodness I liked her profile too :-)

There's no ID so it's okay to post this, right? :-P

      I hate when I'm put in a position where I would actually be saddened, even if only somewhat, should she not respond to my message cuz, well...goddamn. I need some good news because I am clearly very attracted to Number Twelve and I know I shouldn't be because despite the present benefit of her pulling me away ever so gently from Digby, it will come at the ultimate price of emotional doom. It grows inside me, manifesting as an evil* patience this time. Some days I really hate that my Heart is so patient. My Heart is entirely unable to understand that I will one day grow old and die. So...fingers crossed :-)


ADDENDUM: She did not respond to my message.

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* I tend to use "evil" as a synonym for the kind of selfishness which requires the suffering/sadness of another in order for me to be happy. I have trouble accepting that a good relationship can be born of knowingly desiring to benefit from the misfortune of another. In this example, it would be one thing to ask out a girl who's single because her singledom is innocent from your perspective, but to wait for a girl's relationship to sour and end like a kind of vulture before making a move seems inherently wrong. I'm not explaining it well, but I'm hoping you get the point.