I'VE BEEN A BIT DISTRACTED...

     Perhaps that is a good thing. I have all these notes of things I've written down to write about, but their urgency has passed and even though they're not time-sensitive, I just don't feel like doing them anymore.

     The dating sites may finally be paying off. I just met a second girl tonight. It took me eleven months to meet the first one and about a month after her, to meet this one. With luck, this is indicative of a trend or that I've stumbled upon an ideally written profile (for me at least). I still have an extremely low response rate but I continue to persevere nonetheless. The first girl I started seeing was rather insistent that I continue to see other people. It's like she knew I was that type who would focus my energies on just one person at a time. I told her that I would and have been true to that.
     I think I've written over sixty messages since meeting her. I've more than redoubled my efforts. I've only gotten about five or six replies, most of which were basically "Thanks, but no thanks." Needless to say, I am happy to have been given another opportunity. I hope this trend continues before it must necessarily start focusing on actual relationships.

     I'm still on the masturbation abstinence "program". I'm starting to have difficulty keeping track of the days so that urgent part of my withdrawal may have finally passed. The temptations are still there of course. It's been very difficult.
     I feel like my hormone levels are returning to normal. I'm growing impatient too. Usually I can ignore the various pretty girls who come to my register at work to focus on my task at hand, but the urge to flirt with them is becoming powerful. Not so much that I can't still resist it, but that resistance may fall the longer this keeps up.

     While I find it very distasteful, I've been trying alcohol when out on dates with the first PoF girl. I think I can fake it long enough now. The most I've had was enough for it to effect me. I wasn't tipsy or anything but I could feel something different. Knowing this now and coupled with my abstinence, I'm ever more tempted to just go to a bar now though I don't like those environments. They're either too depressing or too loud. Like the urge to flirt, it's becoming harder to resist because damn it, if I can't jerk off, I wanna get laid! :-)
     This is so annoying, but I think it's actually working. I still need a "proof of concept" though...